Dissapearing Memories
by 00-Mariska-00
Summary: I think the title says it all


**I dont own anything!!!!**

**Dissapearing Memories******

"Gotcha, Lab Rat. You never thought i would, huh?" Miss Parker said, having a huge smile of triumph on her face.

"You should have been more careful but well, your stupidity was my success." Parker added as she had put handcuffs on Jarods wrists.

"So I bet Daddy will be proud of you now." Jarod said; hurt in a way only she could hurt him.

"He will." She agreed shortly.

She decided as less as she talked to him as less he could make her a bad conscience.

She didnt need one.

She had searched Jarod for 3 years now and finally deserved to be successfull; finally she could leave the centre and start a new life, since she had taken Jarod's freedom away.

Great, now she made a bad conscience herself.

She hated the Centre and could understand that Jarod felt the same about it. But him being trapped in the Centre was her freedom, and his freedom was her trappedness. Was it selfish that someone else had to suffer so she could be free? Was it selfish that she wanted to get outta the Centre and dragged someone else in instead?

No.

She deserved starting a new life. She always had lived by the rules of her farther. She wanted to make him proud but whatever she did, she had been never good enough. And since her 'missing' twin had appeared again Daddys whole attention was his. And he enjoyed it, obviously. She hated her twin Lyle. Not only for taking her thunder away, also for being that evil. He was _really _evil. Of course her being evil was said from others as well.

But was she really evil? Or was it just her desire to get away from the Centre?

Did the Centre made her evil?

Yes.

At least the Centre had made her emotionsless. She had learned showing emotions in the Centre was the worst thing you could do – especially as a woman. They automatically think that women are weak, soft and lead by their heart. But Miss Parker wasnt that kind of woman.

She never was.

So she didnt bother the nickname she had gotten from some of the workers in the centre 'Ice Queen'. It only showed her that she was perfect in hiding her feelings behind a facade and behind coldness.

But sometimes she had asked herself if she was just a doll and her Dad was capable of the ropes and forced her his will.

Yes, she knew she was a sucker for him.

Why?

It was an answer to an easy question. He never really had paid attention to her as she was a kid – she was a girl, so he thought she would become like her mother – weak, soft, leat by her heart. She really was a sucker for his love but she never got any.

Never.

His first priority was the centre and this was his only priority. She wanted him to be proud of her, that he repsected her, appreciated her for what she was. Maybe he would now, since she caught Jarod.

But was Jarod the key to the proudness, respectness, and appreciation from her Daddy?

Probably not.

So what could she do to make him feel about her like that? She didnt know the answer. Now that Lyle appeared, he was his full proud and Lyle sure didnt wanna share the spotlight.

That fucking moron.

"Didnt come Sydney with you? Or Mr. Broots?" Jarod asked her while walking with her down the street.

It was cold – sure, it was winter. Actually the happiest season. The christmas season. Jarod noticed that Parker didnt seem happy at all. Actually, she didnt even seem happy that she had caught him. Maybe because she could leave the centre and didnt know what to do with her life? Relaxing all the time could become boring at some point. And if she was outta the centre she would see her Dad rarely.

Yes, Jarod knew how much Parker fought for her Dad's attention.

It started as she was a kid already. And her desire for attention got even more as her mother was murdered. But her Dad always had just sent her away. He remembered seeing that little, sad girl, who was Parker, crying her eyes out and telling him how unfair world actually was. As Parker did fight too much for attention, her Dad had sent her to catholic boarding school. He didnt even let her visit him in the summer vacation, nor did he visit her.

After school she went to college. She returned in the age of 20 to the centre and he immediatly gave her a job there.

But was it that what Parker wanted?

Was that the job she had always dreamt of?

Jarod was wondering what Parker would be today if there was no centre. Probably her mom would had been still alive, she had a good relationship to her brother, her Dad appreciated her and she was happy.

Happiness.

Happiness was something what Jarod always wanted for her. But he failed in that, big time.

"They are still in the Hotel." Parker hissed.

Yep, thats how Jarod knew Parker. Always hissing and being in a bad mood.

She had been such a happy kid as her mom was still alive. How the loss of one person could change someone that much. How the loss of someone could change your dreams and wishes. How the loss of someone could change your whole future.

"I see. How are you lately, Miss Parker?" Jarod asked politely.

"Lately? The last 2 minutes i am incredible happy. Finally I gotcha."

That was a lie.

She wasnt happy. If she was happy why did she run around with that expression on her face? Jarod knew a happy person looked a way different.

"I dont believe you." He said.

"You know what? I dont care what you believe, wonder boy. Im not in the mood for some chitchat, so you better shut the hell up." Miss Parker threatened.

Jarod wasnt impressed by this and by far not scared now.

"How's Lyle? I've heard he's back from the Triumvirate." Jarod said.

Miss Parker made a sound of disgust.

Lyle.

Ew.

Fool.

"Heard that he'll be the new Assistant director." Jarod kept going.

Miss Parker stopped walking aprubtly. Assistant director? Him?

"You gotta be kidding, Pezhead." She said.

"Did I ever lie to you?" He asked the counter question.

No.

So he was saying the truth. Lyle as new A.D.? Why wasnt this offered to her? She could have been the new A.D. as well and could have helped her Daddy.

Alright, to be honest, she didnt even wanna be A.D. She hated the Centre and what they did, so she surely didnt wanna get promoted. But she didnt wanna Lyle be more successfull and having a better position as her either.

Damn him.

Damn competition between them.

Damn him for getting what she always had longed for.

Their fathers attention.

Damn him.

Parker slienced after Jarods statement and kept on walking with him along the street as her cell phone rang. She picked up.

"What?"

"Um...Miss Parker?" Broots asked, shyly like always.

Parker sighed annoyed.

"Who else!? You better make it quick!"

Broots cleared his throat. Now he was even more nervous. Even though he worked with her now for 3 years, he was still scared of her. The icy look she had, the insulting, the coldness and carelessness she had when she did something. That made him scared of her. The loss of her emotiones.

"Broots!" She hissed, since he wasnt fast enough for her.

"Um... Lyle called. He wants us to fly back to Delaware for a meeting."

"A meeting? Why?" She asked.

"Um well Lyle is in charge of...us." Broots said, almost inaudioable.

"In charge of us? What the hell are you talking about?"

Broots weirded her out.

"Well, he is kinda our boss now. He's the new... Assitant Director." Broots told her.

"For gods sakes, i know, Broots. But still, i surely wont do what he wants. If he dares to gimme one order i will stick his ugly tie, he is wearing all the time, down his throat. And just because he is the new A.D. doesnt mean we have to jump when he snips his fingers." She said.

"Well..."

"Yer, i know you would, Broots. You would even bow in front of him if he wants to. Get balls, finally." She hissed at him.

Broots silenced. He had no guts, he knew that himself.

"Oh and before you tell Lyle all this, mention towards him that I've got Jarod." Miss Parker said, looking at Jarod in the process.

"You have!?" He asked shocked.

"Just told you so." She agreed.

"But...but i cant call Lyle and tell him what you just said." Broots pointed out.

She rolled her eyes.

"Then tell Syd to do so." She simply said and ended the call.

Broots was pathetic. He was scared of everything. Miss Parker just wondered why he didnt wet his pants in front of her yet. Why he worked at the Centre was a question she probably could never answer. But she had to confess that she liked Broots.

Yes, she did.

It was easy to push him around, make him stotter, make him scared or make him whatever she wanted to. If she thought about it he somehow was sorta a slave.

"Congrats to your new boss." Jarod said sarcastically.

She gave him a warning glance.

"Since Lyle hates you the same way you hate him, you will have long working hours." Jarod kept going.

"Don't you think I dont know it myself? And besides, if i bring you back, i am outta the Centre." She said.

"Are you? Think about it – the deal of leaving the Centre as soon you caught me was made between you and your father. And not between you and Lyle. He can make you stay." He pointed out.

"He cant do anything." She said convinced.

She wasnt sure whom she was trying to convince – Jarod or herself? It was right what Jarod said. She had made the deal with her Daddy and not with Lyle. But could Lyle force her to stay? That question was really bothering her.

"You seem to think about my statement." Jarod noticed.

"No. I am thinking about what I will do first as soon as i brought you back. I couldnt decide between celebrating with champagne or doing some kinda happy dance. But i think I'll stick with the champagne." She answered.

"Well then dont drink too much of it. Think about your ulcer." He pointed out.

"I think you should worry about yourself, Pezhead." She just snapped back.

Her ulcer. Ew. Thanks to the centre she had got that and especially thanks to Jarod. All the running and chasing, and him escaping all the time had brought her to the edge. And because of all the stress she had smoked like crazy and had allowed herself to have all sort of drinks.

She hated the fact that Jarod knew so much details of her life. But some were her own fault. She couldnt keep her mouth shut as she was a child. She wanted someone to talk and since Jarod was at the Centre and around the same age as herself she had trusted him and told him what was on her mind. Now she regretted it – a bit.

Just a bit.

Jarod had really helped her going through worse. She had never thanked him.

Jarod just sighed about her statement. In a way he was right that he should worry about himself but he knew that he would escape before they even reached the hotel where Broots and Sydney waited. Jarod had always worried about Miss Parker. He liked her a lot. He had his first kiss with her. She had been his only friend in the Centre.

Yes, she had been his first love.

Was he still in love with her? He wasnt sure. He knew he loved calling her in the middle of the night, keeping her from sleeping. He knew he loved seeing her once she had found out where he was. He knew he loved the memories he had when he thought about her. That was all he loved, even though Parker was always annoyed when he called at night, angry when she couldnt catch him and denied all the memories they had together.

Why did she do that?

Simple answer – Centres fault. Jarod didnt blame her for becoming the person she was now. Probably he had become like that too if he still would be in the Centre. Thats why he also didnt really take her seriously when she insulted him.

Pezhead. Lab Rat. Chamelion. Wonder boy. Whiz Kid.

That just didnt bother him. He knew what was behind it.

Of course the others she was calling names to were more bothered, like her twin, Lyle.

Moron. Jerk. Asshole. Idiot. Sucker. Bastard.

Yer, Lyle was bothered by this but he didnt really show it. His only reaction to that was smiling. The smile she hated. The smile which said 'I am better than you, bitch!' Miss Parker herself let no one call her names. If someone did she scratched his eyes out or threatened. Threat was her way to shut people up. Not everyone was impressed by this. But the most ones.

Her cell phone broke the silence between them. She sighed annoyed, but accepted the call.

"What?" She hissed even more annoyed than before.

"Not a nice way to answer your call, sis." Lyle said on the other end of the line. "It might scare callers away." He added.

"Too bad it doesnt work with you." She snapped.

1:0 for her.

"Always being snappy." He noticed and sighed. "Anyways, Sydney just called me and told me, you were not coming to the meeting. Listen sis, things will change. Im not only your brother but also your boss that means i want you to show respect to me. And you better bring that up soon or it wont end very nice for you." He said sweetly.

"Are you threatening me?" She asked in disbelief.

"Thats what you say." He simply said.

"You can scare Broots, Sweepers, some cleaners, probably even Sydney but you cant scare me; not mentioning threatening me. I developed the threatening." She pointed out.

"If thats the case, you are aware of the consquiences of a threat, arent you?" He asked.

She could imagine his evil smile on his face right now.

Jerk.

1:1.

"I know your life is boring and useless, Lyle but to make your life less useless and less boring you could call the Centre helicopter pilot and tell him to get his ass here. I've got Jarod."

"Well, dear sis, thats not possible. Dad flew this morning to the Triumvirate. So no helicopter available. Guess you gotta bring Jarod back by car." He simply said.

Now Lyle had her full attention.

"Daddy flew to the Triumvirate? Why?" She asked.

"None of your business, sis. Now _you_ make your life less useless and get your ass here, acompany from Sydney, Mr. Broots and Jarod."

1:2.

Dammit.

She had to make it even before the call ended – or even better – she had to win.

Damn Competition.

"Oh by the way sis, once you are back, a surprise is waiting for you." Lyle mentioned.

"Surprise?" She asked.

"Yes, that's something you don't expect and makes you feel maybe shocked but for sure surprised." He told her.

"I know what surprise means." Parker snapped.

"Oh do you even know the emotion surpriseing?"

1:3.

"Well Parker, i expect you back by tomorrow morning. Dont be late." Lyle said and then hung up.

Dammit².

"A surprise." She wondered out loud.

A surprise would be him telling her that he will shoot himself. Yer, that would be a great surprise.

Parker smiled about that thought.

"Im sorry, Parker." Jarod said.

"Sorry? What for?" She asked.

She didnt need his pitty. What the hell for?

Miss Parker didnt expect him to get freed from the handcuffs while she had been talking to Lyle. Too late she noticed that he pushed her over to the edge of the pavement, too late she noticed that he cuffed her one wrist around a pole, and as she started noticeing she just heard the click of the handcuff who cuffed her other wrist.

Great.

"Dammit Pezhead!" She hissed annoyed as he took out her gun.

"You won't need this." He said. "It's always nice talking to you but now i have to go. Bye Parker." He said and then dissapeared.

Parker stood there – cuffed to the pole – feeling like the biggest fool. Again, wonder boy had escaped. And she really had had him. He had been the ticket to her freedom.

Damn Lab Rat.

Damn her.

Why didnt she see it coming? She must had became smarter by now.

Damn Lyle!

If he hadnt called, Jarod probably hadn't escaped.

Miss Parker pressed herself tight to the pole and tried to reach her pocket of her coat. She succedded. She took out her cell phone and dialled Sydneys number – turning on the loudspeaker.

"Hello?" He answered.

"It's me. Come and get me." Was Parkers short order.

Sydney couldnt hide a short laugh.

"Lemme guess. Jarod did escape again?" He asked all calmly.

Somtimes Parker thought Syd was happy about the fact that she failed so many times.

"You come and get me now? Im about 300 metres away from the hotel. On the pavement. Bring the keys to my handcuffs with you." She said.

"Will do." Sydney agreed.

"And Syd – should you be touching anything else in my purse than the key for the handcuffs, I will rip your head off, got me?" She asked.

"Of course, Miss Parker." The old man agreed and ended the call.

The fact that people stared at Parker as if she was crazy didnt bother her that much. All these pathetic losers who passed her, who hadnt got any life but ran around on the streets to make their boring life a bit exciting, made her sick. This thought brought up a question inside of her.

Maybe she was made for the Centre?!

Without the Centre, would she be one of these pathetic losers and go to mals for excersising or take walks to kill the time?

It didnt take long and Sydney appeared, alongside Broots.

"Shut the hell up." She told them both, before they even could say a single word.

Quietly unbared Sydney her handcuffs and handed her the key.

"Will we head back to Delaware today or tomorrow?" Sydney asked her.

"Tomorrow after lunch." She answered.

Actually she would had head home right away _but_ Lyle wanted her to appear tomorrow in the morning so she wanted to be late. She didnt want that Lyle got the idea that she did what he said.

Syd nodded in agreement. He was okay with that. Broots didnt say anything. He really didnt had an own opinion – probably he was too scared to. An own opinion meant, standing up for your opinoin, and since Broots was always that close to wet himself when he had to talk he rather kept his mouth shut.

"If you aren't glued to the ground, let's go back to the hotel." Parker said; heading in the direction of the hotel.

Sydney and Broots followed her quietly.

In the night she got a call again. From Jarod. Who else?

"What?" she asked drowsily.

"Hey Parker. I hope i didnt wake you up." He said; a slight touch of sarcasm in his voice.

"Where do you get this idea from!? Make it short Jarod. Very short."

"The pole did look good on you today."

"A lot of more poles, which would be a cage, would look good on _you_." She shot back.

She was too tired to think about some more productive answer than that. She hated those midnight calls which kept her from sleeping. But somehow she was used to it and would be probably sceptic if she wouldnt get them. Of course she could switch her cell phone off, if it botheres her so much. But she didnt do it. There were two possible reasons. 1. She wanted to be reachable in case her Daddy wanted to call her. 2. She liked those conversations. Of course she would deny the second point.

"I hope you aren't that angry at me that I escaped again?" He asked, innocently.

"Shut the hell up, Jarod."

"So you are angry. Do Yoga, it really is relaxing and ease the tenses." He told her.

"An easier way without forming my body in an athletic way would be, you coming back to the Centre. It would be relaxing as well _plus _ease the tenses." She shot back.

"Sorry, can't do that."

"But I thought you cared about me. So you want me to suffer? You want me to be not relaxed and have tenses?" She asked.

"I do care about you." He agreed.

"So?" She asked.

"So, nothing. I know you wouldnt be relaxed if I am back at the centre. Even if you will deny it." He said.

"How do you know?" She asked.

"Because I just do." He said.

There was silence.

"Good night, Miss Parker."

He hung up.

With a sigh Miss Parker let herself fall back to the bed and closed her eyes. Now it would take ages _again _until she could fall asleep.

Disturbing Lab Rat!

They arrived at 4 PM at the Centre, on the next day. They got into the Centre and as Miss Parker entered her office, she saw the surprise Lyle was brabbling about.

"What the hell..." She said rather to herself, than to Lyle who was sitting in his leather chair.

"Glad you made it, sis. I already thought you had taken the wrong way home or had driven some bullshit – liken women mostly do." He said.

Probably she had answered to that under other circumstances but that was _her_ office. So what was Lyle doing there with a huge desk, a new chair and ugly pictures on the wall?

"I never thought it would happen if you are in the end of your 20's but you seem to have Alzheimer. Or Amnesia or something. Your office is a few doors away from here." She hissed.

"Well sis, since i am A.D. now i got a bigger office, which will be yours. You get mine. But dont worry, my office has an advantage – the great view to the wall of this building. Thats what women dream about, arent they?" He asked her sweetly.

"If you dont leave my office in the next 10 seconds I'll kick your ass and wipe that ugly smile off your face." She threatened him, looking into his eyes.

His smile grew bigger.

"Bring it on, Sis." He said.

He looked at his watch. Counting provocating to 10 and then looked at her.

"Gosh, it passed 10 seconds and I am still alive." He said playfully surprised. "I guess i am a lucky man." He added. "And besides, we talked about the respect on the phone, no? So show some. Where's Jarod by the way? Oh lemme guess, you let him escape again? Ugh, you are too stupid to catch anything."

That was a mistake.

She didnt let herself insult. Especially not by her jerky Bro.

Her eyes got even icier and she walked closer to him. She grabbed his shirt and glared into his eyes.

"Listen, this is what we gonna do now. 1. You will get outta my office. 2. You will never _ever _call me names again." She snapped.

"Oaw, you scared the hell outta me, baby." He said and just grabbed her arms and put them away from his shirt.

"Get the hell outta here." He said.

"Enjoy this one day in my office because tomorrow it will be mine again, moron." She hissed, freed herself and walked outta the office.

Gosh she hated him.

As soon as she was outta the office she tried to call her Dad. He wasnt reachable. Did Daddy know that Lyle took her office? Did he support this? Or did Lyle just decided to take her office?

She wasnt in the mood staying in the Centre any longer, and besides, she had a 4 hour drive behind her. 4 hours of concentrating, care about the traffic, blah blah.

Miss Parker drove home, took some hot bath, got herself a drink and a cig and sat down in her living room. She hated it being alone with all her thoughts – thats why she drunk after work. Drinking made her less thinking. She didnt know what hurt more – the pain of the ulcer or the pain of her memories of her past.

At least she wouldnt die of the memories of her past – thats what Jarod would tell her.

Jarod.

Lab Rat.

Why did he always sneak to her mind? If he thought about her as often as she did about him?

She didnt know.

Parker fell asleep at some point and slept the whole night through since Jarod didnt call. The next morning she had to go to the Centre again. Unfortunatly. She drove to the Centre, parked there and got out. It was frozen since it was below 32°F. The short way to the Centre entrance seemed to take an eternity since Parker had to go all slowly since it was all slippery.

Damn Ice.

Damn Winter.

As she put her foot on the first stage of the Centre building she slipped. She fell on her back and did hit her head pretty badly.

Parker opened her eyes at some point again and looked around. Had she been unconscious? If yes, how long? She slowly got up, hold her head as her cell rang.

"Yes, please?" She answered it.

"Um, you alright Parker?" Jarod asked weird on the other end of the line. Since when was she answering her calls with 'Yes, please?'.

Parker?

She hold her head. Parker. Why did he call her Parker? And what was he supposed to call her instead? She didnt know. She did not know. What was her actual name?

Oh Fuck.

She couldnt remember. Nothing. Not a thing. Who the hell was she actually? She surely didnt want anyone to know that she couldnt remember. Speaking of 'anyone', who was anyone? Was there 'anyone' who knew her as well? She looked at the huge building in front of her. What the hell was that for a building? Was she about to enter it? Or to leave it? Or to pass it?

"Parker?" Jarod asked again, as she didnt answer.

"Um I am okay, I guess. What about you?" She asked.

Now Jarod knew for sure something was wrong. Since when was Parker interested in how he was!? And since when did he get a straight answer about how she was? Something was wrong.

"To be honest, i am confused right now. Are you trying to play some kind of game or are you on drugs or something?" He asked.

"Um...no?" She put her answer as a question.

"Are you at the Centre?" Jarod wanted to know.

Centre? What the fuck was that?

"The huge yellow building?" She asked.

"Yer." He agreed weird.

"I am in front of it." She said. "Where are you?"

Jarod laughed lightly.

"Good one." He said.

She didnt understand.

"So how come you are in front of it and not inside? Scared to face the new A.D.? Letting yourself ordering around from your bro would be degrading for you, huh?" He assumed.

So her brother was working in there and so did she.

"Um...i guess. I gotta go now. Work is calling you know. Bye Mr. ...?" She said, wanting him to tell him his name.

"Just...Jarod." He said weird. She really did weird him out.

"okay, Bye Jarod." She agreed and hung up.

Something was so wrong. Since when was Parker nice to him? Since when did Parker call the centre 'Big yellow building'? Since when isnt she insulting anymore? And since when didnt she know his name anymore!? He decided to call Syd.

The caller ID of Jarod was showing as Sydney picked up.

"Hello Jarod." Sydney said in a soft voice.

"Hello Syd. Did you see Parker today?" Jarod asked curious.

"Not yet, no. But she has to be here any minute. Why do you ask? Is something wrong?" Syd asked concerned.

He was always concerned. Miss Parker and Jarod were like children to him – children he never had. He had tried to protect them from the evil of the world as good as possible – but since the Centre was evil inside out, Syd didnt succedded.

Syd had been Jarods teacher – his mentor. He had always wanted the best for him. Well, the best what could give you the Centre. Jarod had been a polite, nice boy and he still was. He saw all the evil of the world but didnt change a bit.

Other like Miss Parker.

She had been politely as well. She was nice, cheery and a girl who had had always good mood. It changed – drastically, as her Daddy had sent her to the Catholic boarding school. Sydney was forbidden to have contact to her so he didnt see or heard from her anymore. About 10 years passed and she came back to the Centre.

Cold. Mean. Icy. Kinda evil.

Yes, she did change a lot. Sydney couldnt believe it at first that this woman used to be the happy lil' girl.

Damn Centre.

"Well i am not sure. She seemed to be okay physically but not psychically. She was weird as I talked to her. She had answered the call with 'yes, please'. And she didnt seem to recognize me. She didnt know who i was. And as i talked about the Centre, she asked if the Centre was the 'big yellow building'." Jarod told him.

Sydney thought about it.

"Maybe she reacted like that because of the fact that Lyle's the new A.D. I think it botheres her a lot – the fact that Lyle will get all the attention of her father now." Sydney explained.

"No, it was different." Jarod said and sighed.

Sydney shrugged his shoulders, even though Jarod couldnt see him.

"I dont know. I will see when she finally comes here." He said.

"Okay Syd. Keep an eye on her." With these words Jarod hung up.

Miss Parker in the meanwhile had entered the Centre. She walked along a big, empty hall. She didnt feel comfortable at all here. It looked so lifeless and kinda dangerous.

"Good morning, Miss P." A sweeper said as he passed her.

So he knew her. Probably he knew her brother as well.

"Um excuse me. Do you know where I can find my brother?" She asked him.

"Sublevel 11." He let her know and then passed her.

Sublevel? What the hell was a Sublevel?

"Thanks." Parker just said and walked towards the elevator and got in.

_Now_ she knew what Sublevel meant. Sublevel meant the etages of the building.

In the elevator she pushed the button SL11. Hopefully SL, did really mean, Sublevel.

The elevator door opened shortly after and she stepped out.

A bigger floor than before. Also empty, also she felt uncomfortable.

"Sis." She suddenly heard a voice and made her spin around.

Sis. So this must be her brother. She flashed a smile at him.

"Good morning." She said all politely.

Lyle gave her a weird look.

"Okay..." he just said weird.

Miss Parker wanted to tell him that she couldnt remember anything. She really did wanna tell him – he was his brother after all. But a voice inside of her told her to keep her mouth shut. So she did.

"So um, what work do you have for me?" Miss Parker asked, looking at him.

He glanced at her.

"Are you trying to fool me? Is that your new tactic?" he asked her.

New Tactic? What the hell!?

"No. So tell me what to do." She demanded.

Lyle raised an eyebrow before he answered her.

"Finding Jarod and bring him back."

Jarod? Did he mean the man she had talked to earlier this day? Or did he mean some other Jarod? She didnt know.

"What are you waiting for? Get down to Sydney and Mr. Broots." Lyle claimed.

"And with down you mean...?"

"I start to think that you are the person with the Alzheimer now. You are even more weird than ever today. Gosh. Get your ass in the Tec room, dammit. And stop trying to fool me. It really gets on my nerves."

So, her inner voice was right. She was glad she didnt tell him about her secret. He was a rude man. Very rude. She was family, why was he that mean?

Moron.

If he could be rude, she could be too.

"Just tell me the Sublevel, jerk. Or is that too much to ask for?" She snapped at him.

The snapping. The feeling being angry felt as familiar as nothing else did.

Lyle rolled his eyes.

"You are a way too stupid to keep easy sublevel numbers in your mind, arent you? Its 5, silly." He said.

"Screw you."

With these words she stepped back in the elevator and pushed SL5. Finding the Tec room in SL5 was very easy. Seeing written over a door TECHNICE ROOM with big letters, made her enter this room.

"Oh good morning Miss Parker. I've heard you've talked to Jarod this morning." Sydney greeted her.

How did he know?

"I did, yes." She agreed.

"Hello M-miss P." Broots stottered.

"Whats wrong with him? Has he trouble speaking?" She asked Syd, having some kinda sarcasm in her voice.

Sarcasm - something familiar as well.

Sydney just laughed lightly. He couldnt understand Jarods worries. She seemed to be perfectly fine.

Fine. Hm.

He wouldnt exactly call it fine. He'd rather say; she was like always.

"My brother had told me to look for Jarod and since we have 27 Sublevels, everyone of us will look in 9. You take SL1-9. The trouble-speaker takes 10-18. And I will take the rest. Any more questions?" She asked them.

Alright, Syd took it back. She _was_ weird.

"Um Miss Parker, are you aware of the fact that Jarod isnt in the Centre? He escaped 3 years ago from here and we are supposed to bring him back." Sydney explained all calmly.

"Oh." Parker said.

Broots and Sydney changed looks.

"Is everything all right, Miss Parker? You can tell me, you know that right?" Syd said softly.

"Im just not feeling well." She lied. "I'd rather go home." She told them.

Broots mouth fell open. Did she just admit that she didnt feel well? Did she just admit that she had _feelings_? Did she just admit that she had a weakness?

Sydney nodded in agreement.

"That sure is a good idea." He agreed.

She noticed the second Sydney had nodded that she didnt know where 'home' was and what expected her there. She took a short peek at her hands, seeing she didnt wear a ring. So she wasnt married. But that doesnt mean she lived alone. Maybe she lived with some man? Maybe she had a child and lived with the child?

"Can you drive me home?" She asked the older man.

He again, nodded.

"Thank you." She said and smiled lightly.

Broots mouth fell even more open. Did she just thanked someone? Did she just smile? Did she just show another emotion? What was wrong with Parker?

"Is your jaw numb or why cant you close your mouth anymore?" Miss Parker asked as she looked at Broots.

He did close his mouth.

"So let's drive home." Sydney said and grabbed his coat.

Miss Parker followed Sydney outside and was rather silent as she sat in the car next to him. He stopped the car in a driveway. So this must be her house. Not too bad. She liked her taste.

"Thank you for driving me home." Parker said and opened the car door.

"My pleasure. You know, my offer still stands. If you wanna talk you can call me." Sydney let her know.

She nodded.

"I appreciate that, but I just wanna rest now. Bye."

She closed the car door and walked to her front door and unbared it. She entered her house, looked around and then sat down. A big house for a single person but she

didnt found any sign that someone else except her lived here.

Even the amnesia didnt keep her from her bad habit. As soon as she saw a cigarette etui on the table she took it and lit a fag.

Gosh, that almost felt better than sex.

Almost.

She took the remote, which laid on her table as well, and zapped through the channels of the TV – something she usually never did.

She hated TV. Just crap was on. She did realise that after a short while and turned the TV off.

After walking around in the house, looking at a bunch of pictures and other things she sat down on her sofa and poured herself a drink.

Why the hell couldnt she remember?

She was trying so hard to remember but it didnt work.

She fell asleep on the couch. She slept peacefully for about 3 hours before she woke up again. It was an shocking awaking. She almost got an heart attack.

There was a man sitting across the room in a armchair, looking at her with soft eyes.

"Jeez, what the hell are you doing in my house?" She asked annoyed.

Maybe he lived here too?

"I wanted to see if you are alright. You didnt seem so as we talked." Jarod told her.

Miss Parker recognized his voice – well, she thought she did.

"Aren't you the man who called me this morning?" She wanted to know.

Jarod looked at her and sighed.

"You have no idea who I am, havent you?"

She thought about it.

"Jarod, it was, i guess." She answered unsure.

Then suddenly her face lightened up. He was the one she had to get back to the Centre!

"You are the one who belongs to the Centre!" She said in a strong voice and brought herself in a sitting position.

There was no way she was telling him what was wrong. So Jarod had to find another way, to make her talk. He decided for the most plausible one.

"Um no. I am not _the_ Jarod." He told her.

"Oh, sorry then I guess."

He got her! She fell for it. He looked at her closer – counting one and one together. He was a genius after all – he had to find out.

"You have some kind of amnesia." Jarod said it as a fact.

Damn him!

How could he find out?

"Caused by what? What had happened to you?" Jarod wanted to know.

Miss Parker looked at him, the same way he was looking at her. Could she tell him? Could she trust him? Her inner voice who had warned her from Lyle wasnt there anymore. So no warninings. Maybe it was a good sign. Maybe not.

Damn memories.

"I woke up on the ground this morning. I didnt know why i was lying there – I didnt know a single bit. I still dont know anything." She told him.

"So I was right. You surely have some kind of amnesia. But it surely will get better by the days. I wouldnt worry in your case." He told her softly. "It'd be better you take a few days off of the Centre. Its dangerous being there without the knowledge you had." He warned her.

"Why?" She wanted to know.

"Because you can't trust anyone there expect for Mr. Broots and Sydney – they are in your team. To be honest, I wouldnt trust Mr. Broots that much because he is easy to scare so if someone wants informations from him he just has to snip with his finger." He explained to her.

"What about Sydney? He's the old man, isnt he? Mr. Broots shall be the man who has trouble speaking?" She assumed.

Jarod nodded in agreement and couldnt help but smile.

"You can trust Sydney. You used to trust him a lot as you were little." He told her truthfully.

"I used to? Why did I stop? Did he mistreated my trust?"

Jarod shook his head, no.

"I dont know why you stopped. Sydney never mistreated your trust. Actually you dont really trust anyone. You dont tell anyone anything about yourself, your feelings, your thoughts." Jarod told her.

"Feelings make you weak."

There was a slice of the old Miss Parker. She would had said the same.

"Feelings make you human." Jarod told her. "But you are right in some way." He then kept going. "In the Centre are feelings dangerous, thats why your mother got murdered."

"My mother got murdered?" Miss Parker asked in disbelief.

How could she forget about this fact? How the hell could she?

"Yes. But you will remember as soon as you regain your memories. You will remember all." He promised her.

"Tell me about my brother. He seems to be a rude man." Miss Parker pointed out.

"He most certainly is. He is devilish. Really. You hate him – but you dont fear him, like the most. Its just the best to get outta his way – at least its the best for your health. But you gave a damn about it. You are a fighter. I always admired that. You fight even if it gets hard; even if you got turned down – you keep on fighting. You never stop." He told her.

"Probably my nature, i guess." She said.

Jarod nodded in agreement.

"I am glad you are okay so far." He told her honestly.

"Why?" She wanted to know.

"Because...because i still remember the little girl who spent time with me when I really needed someone. And now you are the one who needs someone every now and then. But unfortunatly I can never appear here because otherwise you'll bring me back to the Centre." He said.

"So why are you here now? Why dont you run away?" She wanted to know.

"Because you wont bring me back to the Centre. Not today."

He was right. She knew she couldnt bring him back to the Centre. He seemed nice. He seemed to be honest with her. He seemed to like her. He seemed to know a lot about her.

"Do you promise to take a few days off before you regain your memories again?" Jarod asked her, softness in his voice.

Was he worried about her?

Yes.

But why? She had to bring him back to the Centre.

"I will." She whispered, agreeing.

"Thank you, Miss Parker." He said and got up from the armchair. "I gotta go now. Take care of yourself, will you?" He asked.

She nodded in agreement.

"Good. Good bye." He said and left the house as quietly, as he had entered it.

She sighed and then went into her bed.

The next day she looked in her cell phone for the name 'Sydney'. She had saved him under the name - Sydshrink. She probably have had her reasons. She called him, telling him she would take a few days off. He agreed, promising her to let Lyle know.

There she had a few days off. But what could she do in the meanwhile except getting her memories back at some point? Going outside, looking at the pathetic loser, who made her sick?

No way.

Not even in a million years.

Has she got any friends actually? It didnt sound like it as Jarod had talked about her. You have to trust your friends and since she seemed never to trust anyone it looked like she didnt had friends either.

Fine.

What did she need friends for? Yer, there was a lot of coming into her mind which was against having friends, but unfortunatly also a lot of arguments for having friends. What was she doing in her freetime? Did she even had freetime or did she spend all the time in the centre?

Her so called 'freetime' was boring and short and always the same. Drinking and smoking.

If she thought about it like that, she was one of these pathetic losers, hiding behind her job.

A pathetic loser.

Great.

How could she just sink this far? How could she let it happen?

If she would remember she would exactly know why. Because the centre took the persons, who meant something to her, away. They got killed or hunted.

Her mother did mean a lot to her – killed.

Thomas, her former boyfriend meant a lot to her – killed.

Jarod...

Jarod did secretly mean a lot to her as well – hunted.

She was trained to hate him.

Again. Damn Centre.

What did they just do to her? What did she become? Did it make her happy? What was happiness after all?

You could define happiness in a million ways. Some people are happy when they become healthy again, or meet another person, win the lottery, spoil themselves. Yes, there are million ways to define happiness.

What was her happiness?

Escaping outta the Centre? Getting Jarod back? Getting loved by her Daddy?

She did not know.

And that made her pathetic again.

Pathetic in not knowing what made her happy.

If she looked in the future, was there anyhting she looked forward to?

Not anymore.

It used to.

She had looked forward to a future with her former boyfriend Thomas. They even had bought a house but as the Centre noticed that she was going to leave, they killed Thomas. They wanted to make her stay.

They controlled her. They controlled her life, luck, wishes and future. They simply controlled everything.

Would the Centre even let her go when she returned Jarod? Or was it another lie?

The Centre was full of lies. Lies, she used to believe. Lies, she wished they were true.

Lies.

Lies were a great plaster if you wanted to make yourself something believe even though you knew it wasnt true.

She told herself she didnt need to find any man to get an own family – she had the Centre. Lie.

She told herself making her Daddy proud was everything she needed to be happy. Lie.

She told herself she wanted Jarod back to the Centre. Lie.

She told herself she liked the life she was living. Big Lie.

She hated her life. She hated the Centre, she hated everything about it. She hated the chasing to ruin Jarods freedom, he really deserved.

Maybe it was the easiest way to avoid everything – to work against the Centre.

She would end dead, she knew so.

Probably she would end with a bullet into her head.

Maybe that was the sweet relief she had longed for.

Maybe that was what she needed to be finally free.

Secretly she still had hope in getting away from the Centre, finding a nice man and spend with him the rest of her life. Maybe even getting kids. Maybe even buying a house together. Maybe even getting a dog together.

Let's face it, Parker, you aren't a princess and this is not a fairty tale; she told herself.

This was a nightmare.

One of those nightmares, you know you have to wake up, but you couldnt for what reasons ever.

Was she sorry for herself?

How pathetic was this!?

She staid at home for exactly 4 days. She did remember a lot again but the ironic thing was that she didnt know if she remembered everything again. Because if she couldnt remember her former memories, how could she know how much of her memories she had gained back?

The most important things she could remember.

She had to chase Jarod, even though she didnt really want to.

She had named Sydney in her cell phone Sydshrink, coz he was a shrink.

She loved to make Broots stotter.

She hated the Centre.

She hated her brother.

She had to get her office back.

That were the most important things.

On the 5th day she drove to the Centre, went into her (former) office. Lyle didnt seem to be there. That was her advantage.

She called her sweeper Sam, telling him to put Lyles stuff in boxes and bring it back to his office. She even helped him to do this; with a quick whip over his table she threw the stuff in the box. She took off the ugly pics and her work was done. Sam carried it into Lyles former office.

Yes, now she felt a way better.

Sam brought back her stuff which had been at Lyles former office. It didnt take Parker 5 minutes and she was finished putting her stuff away.

Lyle entered the office a half an hour later.

"What are you doing in my office?" He asked and looked around, seeing that his stuff was gone.

"Wrong. What are you doing in _my_ office?" She asked him the counter question, looking at him with an icy look.

"You think you can just take your stuff back in this office and its yours again?" He asked. "Gosh you are naive, sis."

"Sam." She called for her sweeper.

He entered.

"Get Lyle outta here. He's giving me an headache." She said, her triumph smile got bigger.

Sam nodded in agreement.

"Mr. Lyle, please." The sweeper said.

Lyle glared at her before he left.

Yes, everything was alright again.

Her cell phone rang a few minutes later and she accepted the call.

"What?" She asked in her ususal manner.

Jarod smiled.

"Thats the Miss Parker I know. Answering her calls with _what_."

"Well, its hard to get rid of habits." She said.

"You seem to have good mood? What had happened? Did Rains die? Or did Lyle shoot himself?"

"Well, if that would happen I would be happier than ever. Nah, I just kicked Lyle's ass. He seemed to need it." She told him.

"Good girl." He said a bit amused.

"Always am."

"So you've got your full memories back?" Jarod asked her.

"I think so. Well, I hope so." She corrected herself.

"Tell me. What do you remember about me?" He asked cheeky.

"You really wanna know?" She asked.

"Sure, i wouldnt had asked otherwise."

"Well, I remember that I probably got the ulcer because of you. That you always call me in the middle of the night and keep me from sleeping. That you annoy me. And that I ruined a lot of gucci shoes because of you – I hate running after you, by the way. And...that you are probably the only one who really knows me." She said; whispering the last sentence.

"And you are probably the only one who really knows me." Jarod said.

They silenced.

"Well, anyways. I gotta get you back here, Pezhead." She said; getting back to reality.

Jarod just smiled. She was completely okay again.

"Good luck, Missy." He said.

"Missy?" She asked in disbelief.

"I thought it'd be time for you getting nicknames too." He reasoned.

"Better leave it." She said and screwed a face. "So Jarod you tell me voluntary where you are right now or do I have to tell Broots to find out for me?" She asked him.

"I dont wanna make it too easy for you. So ask Broots." He said.

"Jerk." She said; but didnt mean it in an insulting way.

"Well, I guess I see you then in about 2-3 days. Depends on how fast Broots is." Jarod said.

"You bet your ass I will!"

"Alright. Goodbye Parker. Im looking forward to see you." He told her.

She wanted to say the same. She really wanted to. But she did not.

Why?

She didnt know.

It seemed wrong.

She had to catch him – that was her job. She should seperate feelings and the job. It'd be better for her, she knew so.

And Jarod knew that she wanted to say the same like he did. He did know so.

"Bye." Was the only word which went over Parkers lips before she ended the call.

Her lips were sealed. She would never let her feelings come to the surface.

Never.

She worked in the Centre – it was dangerous to do that.

And she knew so.

_**The End**_


End file.
